#BeingBuddy: Erasing Fear and Making Art

I can say, without a doubt, that the biggest obstacle to my writing fiction has always been fear.

What exactly have I been so afraid of? Well, that’s a good question.

If I thought you had three or four hours to hear my complete answer, I’d go ahead and share it here. Nah, it’s not that bad. I’m just joking.

Or am I? Actually, I’m one of those people who very often hides behind humor to mask what I’m really feeling or thinking. I’ve done it most of my life and I’m a master at it.

So, why do I do that? Well, it goes back to a lot of fear. Myself and countless others often hide our true selves behind jokes or other sorts of walls because we’re scared of sharing what’s deepest inside of us – our true selves. We often do it because we’re fearful of what others will think about us if we share who we really are.

Will people say that we’re weird? That we’re stupid for thinking the way that we do? That we’re just a bunch of big losers?

Having those sorts of fears is very hard for anyone, but I think it’s especially detrimental to those of us who want to make art. Whether you’re writing or making music or doing anything else where you’re creating art, the best way to do it is to dig deep into yourself and use what’s inside of you.

For me, when I’ve truly gotten into a project and dug deep into myself and written without fear, those times have been my most enjoyable times writing. Where I’ve gotten myself into trouble is when I’ve been fearful of what others would think of those writings. Would people think my stuff was weird? Would they say that I had no talent? Would I be a failure in their eyes?

But then I’d take it to an even worse place. I’d totally abandon those writing projects because of those stupid fears. And then I’d feel like a failure. But I realize now that I wasn’t feeling that way because I felt that I had no talent or that I lacked passion. I was feeling like a failure because I was letting my fears cripple me and totally stop me from doing what I wanted to be doing.

And that’s a shame, isn’t it? I’ve done the above and countless others do the same thing every day. And it’s not even because of other people actually criticizing or being mean to us. It’s because of our fears of those things happening.

But what does it really matter even if people don’t like what we do? Yes, we all want to have approval from others and that’s totally understandable. But if we’re not doing what we truly want to do because we think someone’s going to disapprove of us, aren’t we selling ourselves incredibly short? If we let our fears stop us like that, aren’t we stopping ourselves from reaching our true potentials? From being not only who we really want to be, but also from who we really need to be?

I did it for far too long and I’m not going to do it any more. I’m going to write like I’ve never written before. No more fears. If I feel like writing something, I’m going to write something. When those old fears try to hit me, I’m going to hit them back even harder and then erase them from existence.

fear2

I didn’t realize it until very recently, but I am much stronger than those fears are.

So, like me, if you want to write, then you should write. Sing if you want to sing. Dance if you want to dance. Do whatever you feel passionate about and never let your fears stop you from being who you really are. Do you want to truly be happy? Then make sure you keep being the you that you want to be. That you need to be.

I’m going to do the same. I’m going to keep being Buddy.

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8 thoughts on “#BeingBuddy: Erasing Fear and Making Art

  1. You most certainly have reached many souls today with this very true to heart post. Artisans as a whole, are very critical of their artistic creations. As you know, I too have had many years of my family of origin telling me or showing me that I wasn’t good enough in many regards. Through therapy I found my voice once again and cleared those shoulders of all the demons of the past, that kept telling me I wasn’t worthy enough. There will always be the bullies of the world, those who don’t think your creative work is good enough, but just remember that we can’t appease all the people all the time and there will be those that no matter what, won’t like your creative art. So, stay true to yourself and don’t let that familiar self send you done that road of dispair. I’m so proud of you working on tearing down that wall and sweeping those demons away. Just remember that with each and every passing day it is easier to keep those demons away.

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  2. How long have you been a Writer and what books have you written? How long did it take you to finally overcome this fear, complete your first book and officially be a “Writer”?

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  3. Hi Mary. I’ve loved writing for many years. I don’t have any books out yet, but I’m currently writing a novel that I’m very excited about. Like I said in my posting, I had a lot of fears for many years and they held me back. But not anymore. I’m writing on a very regular basis now, like never before. Without the doubts that plagued me for too long, I’m moving forward by keeping writing, I can happily say that I am officially a writer. 🙂

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  4. This is the most honest, and heartfelt post, I have read. The same fears have plagued me as well. You are inspiring to others with the same fear. We all want others to love our art, whatever form it may be. I am happy that you battled those fears, and in turn, you have helped others to do the same just by your encouraging words. If we always support each other, the hopes and dreams of everyone will grow strong. Thank you for being a writer!

    Liked by 1 person

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